Tuesday, February 23, 2010

The Great Baby Debate

For over the past year there has been a debate going on in our house over whether to have a third child or not. Now, one would think that after a year a decision would have been made, but it hasn't. I wish this were an easy decision and that the answer would just come to us, but we go back and forth. A great deal of my day is consumed with thoughts over whether or not to add that third addition and what it would be like if there were five of us instead of four. Four is such a good number. We aren't outnumbered at this stage, it is easy to travel, shop and do most everything. But really, is that a good reason not to add another? Another sibling for the girls, more laughter and fun each day and during the holidays. More hugs and kisses and "I Love You." Yes, there are these great positives, but there are also the financial hardships, the cost of three college degrees instead of two, Ballet, Gymnastics, Soccer, Piano lessons, etc all times three, how do you know? I think that a lot of my hang-ups are the finances and the way that I was raised. I had a very great childhood filled with travel, and vacations and playing soccer, doing gymnastics and ballet and having opportunities that I want my children to experience as well. We have already started to season the girls on travel and we continue my family's tradition of going to Maine each summer and the girls and I go to Florida in the Spring. They have their activities and they are starting to make friends. How would their life change and would we be able to continue to give them the lifestyle that I had and want them to have. I know people say don't worry about finances and if you wait until you are financially stable you won't do it. But we have been so blessed with two little angels already is it fair for us to want another, or is that too selfish of a move? All of these thoughts run through my mind and I wish we could come to a conclusion because not deciding is really wearing me down. It is almost like I am at the point where I want to say, "okay we are pulling the trigger, let's do it." Or if we aren't, "okay, let's stop talking about it and get on with life and focus on the girls". Ahhhh if only I could see the future and know what the right decision is, ah life, you gotta love it!