36 week update

36 weeks, extra large

Well, here we are at 36 weeks and two days. The longest I have ever been pregnant and wow I am huge! Today I had my doctor appointment and I am measuring 40 weeks, yes 40 weeks. I got to measuring 42 with the girls so if this one doesn't come early I very well could be just as big with one! The doctor said it is long, it grew a lot in the last week. I am also starting to retain water, and my fingers and ankles and feet have started to swell a little, which could be the beginning of pre-eclampsia, the reason the girls had to be delivered. So I am now on the look out for more swelling, and headaches. I am hoping to make it another week even though I am beyond uncomfortable and ready, but I know it is best to make it at least to 37!
So really, no other news, which in this game, no news is good news!

We've made it to 35 weeks!

35 weeks with the girls...3 Days before delivery

35 weeks now, not as big, but still pretty large!

We have officially made it to 35 weeks. Part of me wants to say it has taken awhile to get here, but at the same time it feels almost like time has flown. 35 weeks was a critical point for us. I can now deliver at the hospital where my doctor delivers, they do not have a high level NICU, so if I had gone into pre-term labor I would have had to go elsewhere and had a different doctor deliver me. I have also made it to the point I made it with the girls, so I know what a 35 weeker looks like and how to respond emotionally if it is an early delivery. Baby is currently measuring 37 weeks, so it has slowed down a little in growth, or was laying weird. Either way, my doctor thinks that in about two more weeks my body will decide it is done, that would be New Years...not sure how I feel about having a New Years baby, but what can you do, it would be better than having a Christmas Baby. I will now start going every week to my doctor, which also helps alleviate some of the anxiety I have been experiencing lately and it is just reassuring to hear the little heart beat. Baby is still breech, but it isn't a concern since we will be having a c-section anyway. The girls are starting to get excited, I think, and they ask when baby will be coming out. I am sure they will be excited until they realize how much it will cry, but you never know, maybe it won't cry and maybe they will be able to tune it out. Other than that we are just passing the time playing games and building tents and doing lots of crafts. It is hard for me to be up and about a lot, because my back hurts and I worry about falling outside in the snow and ice. The girls have been very patient and understanding and really it has been pretty dang cold out to be outside long anyway, so they get their outside time in when Daddy comes home and I get a chance to just relax. So here we are with really not much to report, which is really okay and hoping that I don't have any other baby posts until December 27, when I have my next appointment. Goal, make it one more week and get through Christmas then I am fine with whatever happens!

It didn't even cross my mind

For the last month or so Maddie has been battling one nasty sinus infection. She has been on two different medications and as of last Thursday there was no sign of the infection left, good deal! Then late Saturday evening she came into my room burning up, fever, sore throat. Here we go again I think. So I treat the fever Sunday hoping it is just a cold with an elevated temperature. Enter Sunday night at 2:00 am, she comes in again fever is 103.4, cold compress to the head snuggle up to my little heating pad. Outside the wind is whipping and howling and I start having contractions. Really? Natalie comes in, because she realizes Maddie isn't in their room. I can't sleep, Maddie can't sleep and Natalie won't sleep. I wake Tom up and ask him to handle Natalie, because Maddie has finally fallen asleep and I need to lay back down and hope the contractions stop. After about 4 in 40 minutes and a lot of water the contractions stop, luckily! Maddie still wakes up with a fever, headache and sore throat. Strep I think, yup okay off to the doctor again. So we are treating her for strep and last night we notice a few little bumps on her bottom, I think it is from her pull ups, she still has accidents at night. Then this morning she has more bumps everywhere, not just on her bottom. Then this afternoon after gymnastics I am changing her and the rash is everywhere, good lord I think what could that be from? Poor thing is itching and scratching and it just looks painful. So I call the doctor thinking she has Scarlet Fever, because it comes from a strain of Strep. A few questions from the nurse and she checks with the doctor and low and behold she is having an allergic reaction. Good to know I say, as I am glad it isn't Scarlet Fever. Then I sit back and start thinking, wait allergic reaction, can't that be really bad, do I need to worry, what if she stops breathing. So I call the doctor again, thankfully, they inform me that she would have already started to have breathing difficulty if it was going to happen and that if she takes the medicine in the future her reaction could be worse. Okay, I am relieved now and we can concentrate on helping alleviate the pain from the current rash and she gets a new medicine for the other symptoms. What amazes me most is that an allergic reaction didn't even cross my mind. I thought for sure it was something else and the sad thing is I read the little drug reaction pamphlet and still didn't think about it. So to all you parents out there, make sure you double check the side effects and allergic reaction symptoms for all medicine, because even though they may be rare, they can be scary and they can happen to you!

Water

It appears that water really is the key to a healthy pregnancy. When my blood pressure went up over a month ago I think it was because I was dehydrated. I couldn't drink enough water and once I was re-hydrated my pressure went down, my headache went away and I felt much better. Same thing this week with the weird cramping and contractions. I again think I was dehydrated. When I left my doctor on Tuesday she told me to drink lots of fluids and rest. So I drank lots of water and again the contractions subsided and I am feeling better. So I guess the morale of this story is, drink lots of water. If something is wrong or doesn't feel right, drink some water. I am going to try to drink as much water as I can over the next few weeks so I can stay away from the doctor and out of pre-term labor!

Jinxed

So I jinxed myself by saying this pregnancy had been a piece of cake. Today I started having cramping and some contractions so I had to go be monitored for a little while at my doctors office. Luckily, the doctor thinks I just picked up some kind of viral bug. I was having some other symptoms that I shan't discuss here, but I was told to go home, drink plenty of fluids and to just relax. So that is what I am doing, relaxing while I watch Glee and taking in lots of fluids.

33 Weeks and Counting

Saturday marked 33 weeks! I can't believe we have made it here without much drama. At this point with the girls I had been to the hospital a few times for monitoring, gone into early labor, spent a weekend trying to have the labor stopped and then being sent home to enjoy the rest of the pregnancy on bed rest. So we are doing pretty good compared! Also, with the girls I was pretty dang big. At 30 weeks I was measuring 36 weeks. Now I am 33 weeks and showing 36 weeks. So I think I will take 3 extra weeks of growth over 6 weeks. Although I am getting pretty uncomfortable, it is no wonder. Really everything is looking good. Knock on wood my blood pressure went down and has remained down, not exactly sure what caused that little spike a few weeks ago, but whatever it was I have been able to manage it by not eating fast food, boo and drinking lots of water and getting rest. My doctor has said we need to hold out hope that we can make it past Christmas. She said I really need to get to 36 weeks, which would be Christmas Day. So of course my goal was to get through Christmas anyway. It wouldn't be very good if Santa was in the hospital so that is what we are crossing our fingers for. I am taking it easy the next few weeks, at least that is the plan and trying to keep the bun baking. All in all I am healthy and baby looks healthy and we are just trekking along enjoying the holidays and the girls who are absolutely loving that it is Christmas time. The Elf on the shelf returned and he has been helping them count down the days to Christmas by bringing them little surprises each morning instead of us doing an advent calendar. We have one that counts down the days, but he brings little treats as well. The Elf has also helped keep their behavior in check, which has been really nice! They have truly become little helpers though and will do things without being asked. Like clearing their places when they are done eating or picking up without being asked. We still have some battles, but they are really coming into their own and are becoming very independent and helpful. More to come later as well as a belly picture!

31 week update with pictures of then and now

31 weeks with the Girls and I still went 4.5 more weeks :-)

31 weeks now.

Well, we have made it to 31 weeks, our goal is to get to 37 or 38. The doctor said she doesn't like 37 weeks and would much prefer 38, but if labor starts then I am done. As long as we get to 35 everything should be pretty good though, with the steroids, the lungs should be developed pretty well, but there are never any guarantees so the longer we bake the better. The crazy news is baby is already big. It is measuring 4 pounds 12 ounces, 3 weeks ahead of schedule. Baby is 3 ounces shy of what Natalie weighed when she was born. She was 4 pounds 15 ounce at 35 weeks 3 days. Here we are at 31 weeks and baby is 4 pounds 12 ounce. When my doctor saw the ultrasound scans and the results she flat out started laughing. Not just a smile, but a full on laugh. Saying, "and you thought that this would be a an easy pregnancy, because you only had one." So looks like I will be big and uncomfortable at the end, but hey the health is all that matters right? Baby is measuring in the 97th percentile, so that is a change for us, when Natalie is still struggling in the 4th percentile 4 years later, but again health is all that matters. Other good news is that my placenta moved up so that isn't an issue anymore. Baby is frank breach, which explains why it feels like my bladder is being tap danced on all the time and why my stomach feels hard sometimes, because the head is way up by my ribs. The pain under my rib has also been a little hand punching me or pushing on the ribs. Already there isn't much room for the little one to turn over, so I reckon it is good that we are already having a c-section, because I don't have to worry whether or not baby will flip and be in the right position for delivery, it simply doesn't matter. So overall we have a big one, but a healthy one and we are excited to welcome it into our lives hopefully after Christmas!

I Love Christmas, but Really?!

Christmas is by far my favorite holiday. I absolutely love everything about it. The music, the decorations, the trees, cookies, all of it. But, there is a time and a place for Christmas and that does not start the day after Halloween. I get that the economy is in the popper so Christmas commercials are to be expected on TV, displays in the stores typical, but individuals who have all their decorations out, not really okay. There is a house in the adjoining neighborhood that has their garland around their door with lights on, you can see one going up their banister and they have their tree in the window...really?! Then there is another house that has candy canes up the walk and lights on their outside trees. Finally, the kicker, there is another house that has icicle lights around the house, a Turkey hanging on the door that says Happy Thanksgiving and pumpkins on their porch. Three holidays in one...I think not. Again, I must say I love Christmas, but really is it okay to skip over Thanksgiving like it doesn't even exist? Shouldn't we still be giving thanks and spending time with family. Do you really need to put up all your Christmas stuff two months in advance? Our tree will go up the weekend after Thanksgiving like it always does, as will the other decorations inside and out. We will celebrate Thanksgiving with family and we will give thanks. I wish others could remember to be thankful and not go totally crazy the day after Halloween. Remember folks there is another holiday in there between the two!

29 week update

Well, we have made it to the 29 week mark! We had a bit of a scare on Friday, but for the moment everything seems to be okay. I had a regular appointment scheduled, which was good because I had had raging headache since Tuesday. I just knew when they took my blood pressure it was going to be elevated, I just was hoping it wasn't. As I suspected it was high for me, but not dangerous. My doctor was worried about pre-clampsia so I had to do a blood test and a 24 hour urine sample test to make sure everything was okay. My doctor certainly freaked me out though, because she said if the blood work came back abnormal I would have to go to the hospital that afternoon for evaluation and possibly to stay until little one is born...that could be 5-6 more weeks if they could keep me pregnant that long. Luckily, the blood work came back fine. This morning I found out I have small traces of protein in my urine, but they said it is nothing to raise alarm yet so I am just to take it easy and watch my symptoms. If the headache comes back or I start to swell I am to call them right away. The worst part about this whole situation was that I was totally worried and freaking out about being away from the girls for possibly such a long period of time. It is one thing to be laid up on the couch or in bed, resting and taking it easy because I can still play with the girls and interact and hug them, but at the hospital not so much. I admit I had a mild break down on Friday when I got home from the doctor because it was just almost to much, since my whole thing has been keeping their lives as normal as possible. I am pretty sure mom being in a hospital for weeks does not constitute normal! So, for now, everything is okay and I am going to take it easy and poor Tom is going to have to do more housework than normal, but we want this one  to say inside and for me to stay home! So, other than that everything is still going well. My weight gain is still good, I am sure trying hard on that one and I am measuring at 31 weeks, so there must have been a growth spurt a few weeks ago and the growth has leveled out a little. So my next appointment is in 2 weeks, assuming all goes smoothly this week and we get to have another ultrasound so that will be extra nice to see the little one going into the Thanksgiving holiday. So for now, nothing to exciting to report and lets hope it stays that way!

No Sick Days

I must preface this post by saying that I love my "job" as a stay at home mom and I never want any other job, ever! With that said, I must say that there are no sick days when you are a stay at home parent. If you work out of the house and you are sick you take the day off and stay in bed. When your job is to stay home you have to keep "working" and somehow make it through the day. For the past three days I have had a headache from hell. It started on the left side as a migraine on Tuesday my medicine wouldn't touch it. Moved to a migraine on the right side yesterday, again nothing would touch it and today it is again on the right side, mild migraine with the mixings of sinus stuff. Not sure what is going on, that is for sure. I went to the chiropractor and she cracked and pulled and did all sorts of things that broke up some of the tension I was carrying in my shoulders and neck, which helped a little, but the dull ache behind the eye is still there. I would love to curl up in bed and sleep, but you can't do that when you have two, four year olds who don't understand mommy doesn't feel well and they want to keep on moving. I will admit on days when I am just not feeling up to par there is more tv watching going on than I like, but I am okay with that if they are happy and safe. Today I pulled out the craft bucket and they have been practicing cutting. Lets just say, the hubs is going to have a nice paper mess to clean up when he gets home, but again they are at least learning and having fun. They have "cut" out dinosaurs, turtles, a cheetah, hair and various other animals. But again things can't be that simple. Maddie chose today to have an accident, lets see, last accident she had was over 6 months ago, so today would be a good day for that right?! At least she was in the bathroom, which I admit did need to be cleaned, but still, when your head is throbbing the last thing you want to be doing is getting on your hands and knees and scrubbing urine off the floor. (She waited to long and couldn't get her pants off fast enough) but we have almost made it to "rest" time which means I get at least an hour and a half where they are in their room either reading or sleeping and I can surround myself with ice packs and lay down myself. It is days like today when I have small goals, after breakfast it is make it to lunch, then make it to rest time and finally just make it until Tom gets home. At this point I will retire to my room and again ice and try to relax.  So, so far today we have made it through goals one and two and goal three is mere minutes away and at this point we can basically consider the day a success and hope that tomorrow the headache is gone and we can go back to loving staying home!

The honeymoon is definitely over!

They, as in researchers, book writers and other people, say that the second trimester of a pregnancy is the honeymoon period. You aren't so big that you are really uncomfortable, you don't have to use the bathroom as much, because the baby has moved off your bladder and isn't so big that it is constantly sitting directly on it, morning sickness is over etc. Then enter the third trimester, for me the honeymoon is definitely over. I have reverted back to the first trimester again. I have morning sickness, can you believe it, I wake up nauseous and have been experiencing actually getting sick. My aches are more apparent, I am clumsy, forgetful and using the restroom constantly, especially at night. All of these annoyance I can deal with better than others, aches, okay, you can stretch, see a chiropractor, take Tylenol if they are horrible and rest. Bathroom, annoying yes, but you can still function. It is the morning sickness all over again that is really driving me crazy. I wake up more nauseous now than I did in the first trimester. I usually would feel bad after eating in the first trimester, but now I can lay there in the morning and just feel yucky and know that it is going to be an interesting morning. Alas though life goes on and I know in a about two months it will all be over and worth it, but boy o boy I hope I find the strength to push through the morning sickness or that it passes and I go back to the "honeymoon" period, because honestly, this is rough and just when you think you are done you go back in time. Two steps forward and one step back I guess.

Identical, I think yes!

Maddie & Natalie

Having identical twins has always been interesting to me. Yes, they look a like, some days more than others, they have the same DNA, yes, but at the same time it is different. Different you ask, how can it be different? Well, somehow it is, there must have been some mild mutations in the womb while the girls were developing, because while they are identical in theory they are not identical in reality. Maddie seems to have had the most mutation or she just inherited the crummy genes. She has to wear glasses and while her eyes are getting better, she will most likely always have to have some form of help in that department. She also seems to have gotten the worst allergies, she suffers year round, where as Natalie's are more mild. She also seems to have GERD, the poor thing had been "sick" since August and we took her last week to the Allergist, her pediatrician thought it was her allergies still and he scoped her and said her throat is raw and her adenoids are totally swollen. This would explain her restless sleeping and awful snoring. (She was snoring so bad on night that Nat came into my room and said she couldn't sleep because Maddie was snoring to loudly) She is now taking prevacid, which seems to be helping, thank goodness, because if it didn't then we were going to have to look into having her adenoids and tonsils out. I asked their doctor how they can have such different problems and she said she just couldn't explain it, it is just something that happens. The whole different personalities, different likes and dislikes, I totally get, they are after all two different people, which we have always treated them as such. The medical issues though still alludes me and probably will continue to do so. So for now, we go with the flow and handle each issue as they arise and enjoy our little girls each day!

Maddie

Natalie

For the record

For the record, steroid shots HURT! I had a vague memory of the shots I received with the girls, but again, I was on a lot of different drugs trying to stop the labor and that memory was dim. I recalled it hurting a little, but in all honesty, it is painful. There is the usual pinch when it goes in, but wow there is a burn  as the medicine enters the body and an ache long after the needle has been removed. I am sensing that I will be achy later and I get to do it all over again tomorrow. I know it is worth it though, keep little one strong in case there is an early arrival, which we hope there won't be, but you never know, so better to be prepared than not!

27 weeks then and now

27 weeks then...2006.

27 Weeks Now

Today marks 27 weeks for me and the beginning of my third and final trimester. I couldn't be more thrilled be be 2/3 of the way done. I am not sure what it is, whether it is because I am short, or because I carried twins or what, but my body and pregnancy just don't agree. I get tired easily and I have been pretty sore and stretched out. But alas we are almost there and this little one just needs to keep cooking. My doctor thinks we may be looking at a big baby, but we will have a better idea of that at my ultrasound in a month. For now, she has moved our "goal" to 38 weeks. I told her I was fine with 37 and that mentally that is what I am trying to achieve. She said she may be okay with that, but would like to go for 38, but that if things are really stretched she would do an amnio at 37 and if the lungs are mature than deliver. Today I was measuring 31 weeks, so still 4 weeks ahead, but other wise healthy.  I had my glucose test as well, that is one nasty drink to say the least, but I passed without any problems. Which is great, because if I had had to give up sweets and sugar this time of year, I would have been miserable. I did find out that I have anemia, which may explain my excessive tiredness, my occasional dizziness and some of the other things that I have been suffering from. Hopefully a nice iron supplement will help clear up some of that and the anemia can be controlled. Monday, and Tuesday I will get my steroid shots as a precaution to help the lungs mature in case I go into early labor that can't be stopped. A benefit the doctor and I both think is well worth the small amount of pain and soreness that I am going to experience. I had steroids with the girls at 32 weeks when I went into preterm labor and I recall the shots being pretty painful, but I was also on a lot of other drugs attempting to get the labor to stop, so we shall see how painful it really is unmedicated. All I know is that the shots go into the hips and my hips already ache at night, but you gotta do, what you gotta do to help the little one arrive safely! So, as you can see, I am big, but still not as big as I was with the girls and all is still growing and stretching well!

Happy Fourth Birthday Beautiful Babies

Natalie and Maddie 2 months.

Natalie and Maddie 4 years.

To my beautiful baby girls,
Today, you turn four years old. I am not sure where time has gone or how it is possible for you to be four years old already, but here we are. Four short years full of laughter, crying, temper tantrums, hugs, laughing and most importantly fun. You two are two of the funnest and funniest kids I know. You may be identical twins in DNA, but you have such different personalities and you are definitely individuals, yet you are both so carrying and gentle. Maddie you are our little sports girl. You love playing soccer and swimming without your life jacket and of course your gymnastics. Natalie, you are our artist. You spend time drawing pictures and you prefer ballet over aggressive sports like soccer.  You take care of each other and are for the most part so sweet and loving. You have gotten very self reliant    and you can do so much for yourself and by yourself. Your imaginations are amazing and the way you two play together is unbelievable. You started school this year and you go two days a week. One day a week you go to the new school at the Children's museum. You love this school and you have learned so much already. The opportunities you are getting at the museum are amazing and you get to see a new exhibit each week and you do crafts and they are teaching you how to do design on the computer. Some of the pictures you have brought home are pretty amazing for a four year old! You spend your other day of school at a nice church school near our house. You enjoy this school as well, but in a different way. This school is more structured, but the things you are learning are amazing. Maddie, you love dinosaurs and my favorite thing is when you ask me what kind of dinosaur something is and I answer and you usually say, "no mom, it is a..." correcting me and telling me what the correct dinosaur is.  Natalie you like to create, whether it is drawing or singing or building things out of books or blocks or whatever you are both creative. Smart, beautiful and amazing. We are beyond blessed to have two sweet little angels to bring such joy to our lives on a daily basis and I can't wait for the two of you to become big sisters in a few months. I know your life will change when little peanut joins us, but already you are so great  with it. You enjoying laying on my belly and hugging it and kissing it. You like to make the baby kick and you tell it you love it. I can't wait for  you to have another sibling so you can teach it all of the things you have learned and look out for it like you look out for each other. My beautiful babies I am so pleased and blessed to have you in my life and I can't wait to see what the next year brings. I love you so much and I hope you have such a wonderful birthday. Happy Fourth Birthday Baby girls, I love you, Mommy

25 weeks and I waddle

Yup, you read that right I have reached my 25 weeks, only 14 more to go and I am already waddling. I was out shopping yesterday and I caught myself doing it...waddle, waddle, waddle. I couldn't believe it and try as I might to stop it is like my body has a mind of its own and that is just how it is choosing to walk these days. Today I feel like an old lady. Everything aches, I have heartburn and I was finding every day simple tasks, like walking up the stairs to be tiring. I know I still have a long way to over 3 months and I will make it, maybe I need more sleep. Not sure what is up, but I will push on. No other real updates as of today, I don't have another appointment for two more weeks so no growth stats or weight statistics. Just this lovely picture showing how increasingly large I am getting in the front and the back and my new waddle. Good Times :-)

Back Up and Running

Well, I think we are officially back up and running here at Shades of Green. I am not sure what exactly I did to my template, but it was a disaster, but I think it has now been revived!
In other news, we have made it to the 24 week mark. I am feeling pretty good, although I definitely had a growth spurt this week. I woke up yesterday and felt huge, I asked Tom if I looked bigger and he unfortunately said I did. Not sure what this little one is doing but it is sure growing like a weed. We spent most of the weekend, okay all of the weekend painting peanut's room and cleaning the carpets and trying to get everything ready. I can't decide if we are jumping the gun on getting everything done this early, but I feel like the next 15 weeks are going to fly. The girls turn four in two weeks and then before we know it Thanksgiving will be here followed by Christmas and then we are there. Sometimes I feel like this pregnancy is taking an eternity, but in reality it is going pretty quickly. In a few short weeks I will already be into the third trimester and it is all down hill from there. I am currently on my last few weeks of four weeks between appointments and then I go to every two already. My stretch marks or messed up stomach from the first pregnancy doesn't look as bad as it did before,everything is flat and stretching out nicely. Unfortunately I am not holding out hope that my belly button is going to remain in. It is slowly stretching and I am hoping against hope it doesn't pop, it never did with the girls, but I am not so sure this time. So really that is all that is going in this little world and one of these days I will get another belly picture up since we have really grown in the last few weeks. So for now we are back up and running and more is to follow.

All Messed up

As you can tell, I was attempting to do some maintenance on my blog and update my template when I screwed everything up. Please bear with this horrible layout as I try to figure out what I have done. As in don't mind the double posting because I have no idea how to get rid of the side bar posting or where my archive disappeared to. Hopefully we will be back up and running soon!

23 Weeks

Tomorrow marks my 23 week mark in gestation, but wouldn't you know it I am measuring at 27 weeks. Nothing unusual for me since I was huge with the girls, but I still thought I wouldn't be that big this time around. My doctor said that because the girls were "big" for twins that this one might be bigs as well and that I am pretty stretched out. I am feeling the usual aches and pains at the stage. I have had some pressure in the pelvic area, but my doctor said there is nothing to worry about unless there are sharp pains that don't go away. There is always the chance that my first c-section scar could tear, but I am crossing my fingers that doesn't happen, because it wouldn't be good. My doctor is still holding out hope that I will go until 39, but my goal is to make it to 37. I will be getting steroid shots at my next appointment as a precaution to help peanut #3's lungs mature and develop faster just in case I can't hold out. So far there are no indications that I won't be able to, all is going well and my weight gain is pretty steady and I am in the middle of the recommended weight gain for this stage, also a good thing! Other than that my appointment was pretty uneventful and as far as pregnancy goes that is a good thing!

22 Weeks, Then and Now

Everyone always says that each pregnancy is different and if you take a look at these pictures you sure would think so wouldn't you.

22 Weeks Pregnant with the girls.

Almost 22 weeks pregnant with peanut #3

I was definitely larger with the girls at this point, but just wait for some future comparisons, because I am sure there will be a much bigger difference down the road. As for this pregnancy being different, other than the fact that I weigh about 20 pounds less at this point and I am smaller than last time, by this time with the girls I was already measuring 32 weeks (10 weeks further along than I really was), not much else has been different. I have had the same symptoms and similar/not many cravings at all. So far this pregnancy has been easier, probably due to the weight and my size and I am thankful for that. I am also seeing a chiropractor this time, which I think, whether it is psychological or whatever, has made a ton of difference. Before I started seeing the chiropractor my back was hurting and I wasn't even 12 weeks yet, but now there is very little pain and overall I physically just feel better. We are officially 21.5 weeks now and since I will have a scheduled c-section that only leaves 17.5 more weeks to go. I am hoping with the fall activities, the girls birthday and the holidays that these weeks will fly by, the weight will stay down and I will continue to feel as well I as I do. So look for more comparisons in the next weeks and don't cringe, because my belly was very large at the end with the girls!

Almost one month down

I can't believe it, but this Friday will make an entire month down for the girl's preschool. So far they are loving it. It seems like they really enjoy the Museum school the most, but like both of their schools and all of their teachers. We ended up signing them up for one day at the Children's museum school downtown and another day at the school here in Avon. So far it has worked out well. They get a little confused on which school they are going to some days, but they have already figured out which one is which once we distinguish between the "museum" school and the "other" school. The drive downtown hasn't been nearly as bad as I had anticipated either and I have enjoyed sitting in a quiet corner of the museum reading for a couple hours a week as well. I discovered a lot of the other moms/caregivers do the same thing, either sit and read or go explore the museum once it opens. I may venture into the museum somedays, but I have just been enjoying the peace and it is nice to just sit and read without distractions. The girls have already started to become a little more vocal after school days and they always have lots to tell us, usually starting with whatever snack they had that day. I am just amazed at how fast time is flying and while I like it to go fast for the pregnancy, I wish it would slow down with the girls. They are growing up to fast and I find myself daily reminding myself to enjoy every moment and every hug because there may come a day soon, when they don't want to snuggle or curl up in my lap, what lap I do have left at the moment. So for now, we are enjoying the moments and the girls are enjoying both of their schools and their snacks :-)

18.5 Weeks

We have made it almost to the half way point already. It is crazy to think how time is flying, at least right now. I am not sure if time drug with the girls because there were two and I was huge by this point or if time is flying this time because we are so incredibly busy with the girls there is no time to even think about what is coming down the pipe. My mom emailed me yesterday asking if today was the big day. I thought she was talking about the girl's first day of pre-school which is Friday, but she meant ultrasound day. Yep, I even forgot it was ultrasound day, the day we got to find out what we were having, yes we know and no I am not going to post it here for various reasons, but either way we are happy and excited and it is healthy! It is measuring about 5 days to a week ahead of schedule, but that is still okay and all looks healthy. So far my official weight gain stands at about 8.5 pounds, I wish it were a little less, but really I should be happy with that. If I was listening to my doctor I would be upwards around 18-19 pounds, she said a pound a week roughly for the pregnancy. 40 pounds seems like a lot to me for a singleton, so I am trying to keep it down as low as I can. With the girls I was way over 21 pounds and looking a lot larger than I do now. I feel really big, but when I look at the few belly pictures we have from the girl's pregnancy this is nothing. Other than that things are going well and progressing nicely. My placenta is presenting a little low, but my doctor didn't seem concerned. I on the other hand of course want all the information on what this means. She said most likely it will move up as the uterus grows, but that if it doesn't it may be declared placenta previa. For other cases this would mean the person had to have a c-section, which I already have to have regardless, because of the classical incision used to get Natalie out, that in itself is an entire separate blog post. At this point I am like that is okay, since I already have to have a c-section. The doctor then says I may have to be on modified pelvic rest, no lifting, no heavy house cleaning etc. So I could still drive the girls to school and wouldn't be laid up in bed, okay that I can handle. Finally, the doctor says and there is a 40% chance that you might have to have a hysterectomy. Now usually I feel like knowledge is power, but from now until my next ultrasound in 10-12 weeks I get to wonder if this will all happen and how the c-section will go. I am not much of a gambler I could handle the odds of 3-7% chance of us having twins again because they were so low, but a 40% chance of a hysterectomy scares me a little. I mean we are 100% done having kids, but there is just something a little daunting to me knowing my c-section may not be a plain ole c-section. In all honesty I am going to try to not worry about it, because like the doctor said the placenta might move on up and all would be okay and either way, there is nothing that can be done if it doesn't move and I will just have to have faith that all will go well and at least little peanut #3 is healthy and growing and a very active little one at that. I am already feeling kicks and it was very active during the ultrasound. So for now that is the update from our world more to come in the next weeks!

The girl's feelings

I have had a few questions about how the girls feel about bringing a baby into our family and I believe they are excited. I don't think they understand the whole idea completely, but we have been very honest with them from the beginning. Before we started trying we asked them if they would like a brother or sister and they both said they wanted a sister :-) Then a little while after we found out we were expecting Maddie came up to me one day and asked me if I had something in my belly, like she already knew. Out of the two of them Maddie has been way more into things asking me about the baby and asking to look at the baby books and wondering how big it is today and this and that. She also likes to curl up with me and pat my stomach. This gives me a little comfort since she is the one I am most worried about adjusting. Maddie has always been a momma's girl and one of my biggest fears would be that she hate me if we added another child. So far she has shown that she is going to be a great little helper. They go to all of my appointments with me and the other day they both ran over to my side and asked if that was the baby making noise when we heard the heartbeat. I know we will still have a big period of adjustment when the little one arrives, but the goal is to keep their lives as normal as possible throughout the introduction. I am making plans to ensure that they are able to go to all of their activities and school and that their daily routine doesn't get changed to much. My mom is going to come stay with us so that they get to sleep in their own beds and be around the things that are familiar to them while I am at the hospital. I want this experience to be positive and not a big wrecking ball running through their lives. I know some will see my wishes and desires and "rules" to be anal and controlling, but I know how I want things to go and I am going to do my best to ensure that things are done the way I want them, because I want the girls to feel included and not feel like we have forgotten them. We plan on having them come to the hospital as soon as they can after the baby is born and after Tom and I they will be the first to meet their new sibling before anyone else. We are also making plans to take them to a sibling prep class at the hospital where they get to learn about the new baby and some things to expect when it arrives. Overall I think we will be able to make this experience positive for everyone it is just going to take some planning and dedication from us and understanding from others in our lives as to how we want things handled. For now though life goes on as is and we are just going to a few more doctor appointments than usual and things with the girls are good!

How quickly one forgets

A few months back back I wrote about the great baby debate that was going at our house, well the debate has been finished and we are happy to announce that we are expecting Stahl Peanut #3 in mid January. At first I was really nervous about our decision, but as things have progressed I am getting more and more excited. I was nervous we would have twins again, a task I wasn't sure I would be able to handle. We only had a 3-7% chance of having twins, but that percentage was enough to make me incredibly nervous for the first 9.5 weeks until we saw the sweet little picture of the ONE! So far things have been going pretty good. I have been pretty sick and I have been anti-neasuea medication for 6 or 7 weeks now. There was one day I was pretty sick and almost had to go to the hospital, but things are getting better and I am less tired and feeling more human. I have found it pretty amazing how quickly you forget things that now seem clear as day. I remember being sick, but I didn't remember being as sick as I have been. I also didn't remember the aches and pains i am already having, but Tom says he does remember and he just laughs at me when I ask if this or that was like when I was pregnant with the girls. Other than the usual aches and pains and expected things all is going well. I have gotten bigger faster this time, but my doctor said I am measuring where I should be and all is going well. The babies heart rate was 166 today and it was great to hear the little heartbeat again. We will have our ultrasound at the end of August where we may or may not find out the sex of the baby. If we do find out we may or may not make it public, we may choose to wait until the little one arrives to make the gender public. We are handling this pregnancy a little different than our first and we are sharing things later and keeping more things to ourselves. I am not sure if it is because we are enjoying our last pregnancy, because this will be the last or if it is because there are so few things in life you can totally control or what, but I promise to post more as the pregnancy progresses, but whether the sex of the little one is announced I cannot guarantee. So that is the news for now and I reckon there will probably be more blogging from me in the near future since I will actually have something to blog about!

Educational Dilemmas

From a very early age it has been engrained in my that education is one of the most important aspects of life and that you can get a lot out of it and it will help you go far. I don't think this engraining started when I was 3, but here I am making educational decisions for the girls that could affect their futures. I never thought that I would have to worry as much about preschool as I have/do. It is crazy, I spent months and months looking at different programs and schools and finally found one that matched most of our criteria, only to be able to get the girls enrolled one day a week. I was fine with that at first, but as it gets closer to school starting I wonder if they would benefit from an additional day. We have the opportunity to send the girls to a new preschool that is being held at our Children's museum. I have a few hesitations, mostly that it is downtown, which would mean driving the drive every week to get there, but it seems like a wonderful opportunity. It is a Montessori based school, which means it allows for structured free thinking a philosophy that I think is great and one that I wish we could have enrolled in from the get go, but the school out here just isn't affordable for us as this time. This program is and it offers what we want and allows the girls to explore the museum in way that they probably wouldn't be able to with me. My dilemmas you ask? Well, I fear that I will sign them up for an additional day at this school and then I will get a call from the school out here where they will also attend telling me that they have an additional day for them. Then, do I ditch the Museum school, eat the non-refundable deposit, do one day at each school or do three days of school. I know one would think that this shouldn't be a stressful but to me it is. I want the girls to have a great experience early with school so that they don't hate it later in life and I want them to learn as well so to me this is an important decision. Right now I think I am leaning towards signing them up at the Museum and seeing how it goes and crossing the bridge, if I get to it, if there is another day available to them at the school out here. A decisions, decisions, things that you won't find in a parenting book, but that would be helpful!

Boring

I have decided lately that I am a very boring person. I feel like I used to have so much to blog about, but lately, or really not so lately I just don't have much of importance to share with others. When I do want to blog I find that it would just be me complaining so I resist, why put others through a whine feast unless it is a really good one?! Don't get me wrong I don't just sit on the couch staring at the wall day in and day out, we are very active, but I don't think the few readers I do have need an update daily on the activity we went to that day, unless it is a new and good one. I have a feeling the blog may pick up in the fall when the girls start school, but who knows. They are such silly little things that they say the craziest things, which I often think I should share, but as quickly as I have the thought of sharing it is gone. At the moment they are playing "animals" their favorite thing to do and the cat is making pig noises, while a giraffe is asking for hay to eat. Their imaginations are amazing and I am so lucky that they can go off and pretend play together and it sure is fun to sit and listen to what their little minds come up with. Mud baths and going to the airport, traveling all over and going to the zoo are just a few of the destinations the "animals" have been too.
So anyway, again, not much is going on here, but if I think of something good to write about more will follow, I promise.

Summe Daze

I have officially already entered into the summer daze. It got hot out way faster than I anticipated for the year and it has been pretty awful. I am not a girl of heat. I like my jeans and sweatshirts and laying by a fire wrapped in a blanket. I don't enjoy sweating when I walk out the door or when I get out of the shower or when the air conditioner isn't set low enough at night and it is almost 80 upstairs when I wake up. We have had the great luxury of going to our Friends the Welch's pool a few time already which has been a great heat escape and we have our wading pool set up outside. It just hasn't been a very great start to summer for me at least. The heat doesn't seem to affect the girls though, they are ready to go outside and run around, be pushed on the swing and to play in the sand box. We are doing a few activities this summer, Ballet, gymnastics and Maddie has tried out soccer. She loves it, but I have been less than thrilled with the "coach" they touch the actual soccer ball for roughly 10 minutes out of 60 and that is not what I am paying far. Not to mention that the facility does not have air conditioning and is a huge warehouse with no ventilation. We may only do one session of that and then try again in the fall, since she really does enjoy it. Other than that not much has really been shaking around here, just relaxing and enjoying the slower summer pace.

Profound

There are times in life when things happen that are fantastic, then there are other times where your world can be shattered in an instant. My immediate world hasn't been shattered, but it has really been shaken. Yesterday, a young sister and brother of some family friends were killed in a car accident on their way to school. In one split second that families world was turned upside down and nothing will ever be the same for them or their close friend. It is profound to think how life changes, and how other people's lives can change yours. As a parent you always want to keep your children safe and protect them, while loving them at the same time. I never understood this really until yesterday. I mean I love my children and want to keep them safe, but I never really thought about how hard it can be to do this. When we were younger my brother and sister and I used to beg my dad to let me drive them around and we didn't see what the big deal was, but he always held fast and would not let us ride together. I think now it still makes him a little nervous when we all go off together, but we are allowed to. I didn't understand fully why he wouldn't let us ride together until yesterday. I get it now, his "insanity" was his way of trying to keep us safe. It makes me sad that this tragedy had to occur for me to see why my dad did this and it makes me think about my future and how I am going to keep the girls safe as they grow. Aside from never letting them leave the house there are no hard fast guarantees to safety, but I hope that I am able to pass on some of the wisdom that my parents gave me, to them. I also hope that this feeling I have now of deep sadness, loss and confusion, pass soon, but at the same time stick with me and remind me that life can change in the blink of an eye and that you can't take the one's you love for granted, you have to live each day like it is your last and treat people with love and respect. My heart is breaking for this family and I hope they find peace soon and they are in my thoughts and I am grieving with them over their loss.

Winning the battles, but losing the war

I have been battling my weight for a large part of my life or for as long as I can remember. I am always "dieting" or watching what I eat, and working out trying to lose "X" amount of pounds. Last year I lost almost 18 pounds and I was so proud of myself. Then enter winter and the holidays and here I am about 5 months later and I have gained back 10 of those pounds. Annoyed and angry with myself I can't stop eating. I pick up something bad, think to myself, "don't eat that" and then follow it with eating what is in my hand and then some. It in all honesty is disgusting and I know I shouldn't do it. Each week we get an organic food delivery. Fresh fruits and veggies and other wholesome organic food that is really good for you and for the most part tastes really good as well. Then I follow it up with chocolate or some of the girls bad for you cookies, it is horrible. I negate the the bad food by "working out" I have trained for and finished one half marathon this year a few weeks ago and I am again currently still training for the Indianapolis Mini Marathon. I of course use my training as an excuse to eat more and more bad junk food and it does nothing for me. Not only am I putting on the weight but the weight is affecting my knees, again, which in turn affects my running. When I was 10, 15 pounds lighter it really made a difference, crazy as it sounds it was easier to run, but as the scale goes up, the harder it gets to run and the more I eat because I am depressed. I know I eat for comfort and mostly because I am bored, and boy do I wish that I could stop this cycle. It is horrible and I keep finding myself trapped in the lose/gain battle that has become my life. Now enter Spring and no more excuses. It is the time of the freshest fruits and veggies, great weather and the chance to be outside, walking and playing with the girls till our hearts are content. Hopefully I will be able to get some of these pounds back off and hit the weights to tone up. Then come next fall and winter, the exercise will not slack and the pounds will not come back. so here is hoping I can keep up with goals and ambitions and keeping the pounds at bay and to ending this life long weight cycle.

The Great Baby Debate

For over the past year there has been a debate going on in our house over whether to have a third child or not. Now, one would think that after a year a decision would have been made, but it hasn't. I wish this were an easy decision and that the answer would just come to us, but we go back and forth. A great deal of my day is consumed with thoughts over whether or not to add that third addition and what it would be like if there were five of us instead of four. Four is such a good number. We aren't outnumbered at this stage, it is easy to travel, shop and do most everything. But really, is that a good reason not to add another? Another sibling for the girls, more laughter and fun each day and during the holidays. More hugs and kisses and "I Love You." Yes, there are these great positives, but there are also the financial hardships, the cost of three college degrees instead of two, Ballet, Gymnastics, Soccer, Piano lessons, etc all times three, how do you know? I think that a lot of my hang-ups are the finances and the way that I was raised. I had a very great childhood filled with travel, and vacations and playing soccer, doing gymnastics and ballet and having opportunities that I want my children to experience as well. We have already started to season the girls on travel and we continue my family's tradition of going to Maine each summer and the girls and I go to Florida in the Spring. They have their activities and they are starting to make friends. How would their life change and would we be able to continue to give them the lifestyle that I had and want them to have. I know people say don't worry about finances and if you wait until you are financially stable you won't do it. But we have been so blessed with two little angels already is it fair for us to want another, or is that too selfish of a move? All of these thoughts run through my mind and I wish we could come to a conclusion because not deciding is really wearing me down. It is almost like I am at the point where I want to say, "okay we are pulling the trigger, let's do it." Or if we aren't, "okay, let's stop talking about it and get on with life and focus on the girls". Ahhhh if only I could see the future and know what the right decision is, ah life, you gotta love it!

Well no wonder

Today, after having put it off for years, I finally went and had allergy testing done. I was pretty sure I was allergic to the usual dust, pollen etc, but I had no idea I was pretty much allergic to everything in one way or another. It turns out I am allergic to dust, mold, grass, candida (yeast), dogs and cats and a few other things. As my dr. put it, i am severly to moderatly allergic to everything including the cats and dogs, which is pretty comical, because we have two cats and one happens to be a long hair. My dr. gave me some options of using Allegra and Nasonex or starting immunotherapy treatment in the form of shots. I agreed to the allergra and such, but am having to think about the shots. It is a 3-5 year commitment, where the first year you have to go every week to get a shot. That seems like a huge commitment, but in the end it will probably be worth it, so we will see.
My doctor also recommended that there are things around the house I can do to help alleviate some of the household allergies, which most of these things we already do and I really wonder if other people don't?!
1. Vacuum at least every two weeks, can anyone really go two whole weeks without vacuuming? We vacuum almost every day if not at least 4-5 times a week, so once every week is easy.
2. Launder the sheets and bedding once every 7-10 days. The best thing in the world is clean sheets which I change at least once a week or more depending on what is going on, it never really occurred to me that others wouldn't change their bedding as frequently.
3. Keep the cats off the furniture and out of the bedroom. On this one I was laughing hysterically in my head because not only do we let our cats in the bedroom and on the furniture, but my cat, for the last 8 years, has slept with me pretty much right by my face or at the very least at my feet. I was like okay this is one of my main allergies how do I kick her out after 8 years.
4. Eat a low yeast diet. This one will ,if I chose to proceed, be the hardest to accomplish, it basically is a diet of fruits, veggies, meat and nothing else. While this is the hardest to implement for me, a lot of my health issues may be related to this allergy. Headaches, pms, anxiety, depression, Lactose intolerance, fatigue, panic attacks and digestional distress can all be caused from this one allergy and of course I suffer from these almost daily if not weekly. So I am going to start working on my motivation to try that diet, but giving up sugar sounds like and awful hard task and one I am not sure I can handle. I love me some chocolate.
So basically it was a little shocker to actually find out what my allergies are, but at least I have a starting off point and maybe I won't have to spend the next 30 years in pain and depressed because I least have a little idea of what is causing some of my problems. So here is to a very clean house, and a possible diet change that could definately change my life for the better.

Take a Moment

All to often in life we focus on the negative aspects or the bad things that are going on around us, instead of focusing on the positive and good. I know that I am as guilty as the next person for looking at the negative and for not being happy all the time, but all to often I am down and not truly enjoying life the way I should be. One never really knows how short one's life will be and each moment should be lived as if it were the last. You can't spend your life pleasing others or living for others, but you can live for yourself. You are the holder of your own destiny and if you are to be happy then it is up to you to make sure you follow the path that will bring this happiness to you. Otherwise you will be destined to be unhappy and to live an unfulfilled life. So in the words of Anais Nin:

Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living.

So form your dreams and go after them, you only have one life so you might as well life it to the fullest.